This February, JLIC Michigan hosted a warm and engaging series called “Love with the Lorkis’,” where Rabbi Uri and Abby Lorkis created a space for college students to explore relationships, dating, and marriage in a Jewish context.
The three-session series welcomed about 15 students each week to the Lorkis’ home, combining delicious homemade dinners with thoughtful discussions about relationships. The setting created that perfect blend of casual comfort and meaningful connection that busy college students needed during the winter month.
A Curriculum That Resonated
The Lorkis family thoughtfully designed sessions that met students where they were in their relationship journeys:
- Dating Yourself: Students explored the importance of self-understanding before pursuing relationships. The Lokis’ led discussions on identifying personal values, boundaries, and interests separate from relationship status. Students reflected on questions like “What brings you joy independently?” and “What aspects of yourself do you want to develop before bringing someone else into your life?” The session emphasized that healthy relationships begin with a strong foundation of self-knowledge and self-respect.
- Examining Relationship Expectations: The group discussed how media, family dynamics, and cultural influences shape our relationship expectations. The Lorkis’ guided conversations about distinguishing between Hollywood romance ideals and authentic connection. Students shared how their family backgrounds influenced their views on partnership roles, communication styles, and conflict resolution. Through Jewish texts and contemporary examples, the session helped students identify unrealistic expectations they might unconsciously hold and refocus on values-based relationship goals.
- Empathetic Listening: The final February session introduced different listening styles, with special focus on empathetic listening as a foundation for healthy relationships. Participants learned to distinguish between listening to respond, listening to fix, and listening to understand. The Lorkis team demonstrated techniques like reflective responses, maintaining eye contact, and asking clarifying questions. Students paired up to practice these skills directly, tackling both everyday scenarios and more challenging conversations about values and beliefs.
Creating Home Away From Home
What made these February events special was how they addressed topics particularly relevant to college students navigating independence, identity, and relationships. As one student put it, “Between classes, exams, and figuring out our futures, having a space to talk about relationships with mentors who genuinely care made a huge difference.”
JLIC couples like the Lorkis’ serve as extended family for many students, providing guidance during these formative years. By hosting these events in their home rather than a classroom, they created an atmosphere where students could comfortably discuss personal topics while enjoying home-cooked meals together.
The February “Love with the Lorkis'” series exemplified how JLIC programming successfully balances Jewish learning with practical life skills, meeting students’ needs while acknowledging their busy college schedules. Through these relationship-focused gatherings, the Lorkis family strengthened not just students’ understanding of healthy relationships, but also the bonds within the campus Jewish community itself.
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